December 13 2014,
I am full of hate!
I do not know if you can even imagine how much hate I feel for Padawan!
After my last FR that criticized a little him, Padawan was upset. So what did he do? He copied and sent it to the chicks we both know in common.
Several came talked to me, angry, saying that I was calling them “poor pussy” or I do not know what. And they hold me to account. So: did they go to shit for not much or did he change the words in my FR before sending it in order to be sure to offend them? We will never know but I highly suspect it. In any case, it’s a shame : When you’re the wingman of someone, you cannot do things like that as soon as someone question you. Should be a little more humble. And I will follow this example myself in the future.
His justification “From the moment you talk about me I do not see what is the problem. So shut up, cordially J “
Trust is broken down.
I have always said good things about Padawan and hidden his defects in my FR … so that today: he is too much big-headd. When a girl does not want him (often) she is an idiot who does not understand life even though she was great before, when he still thought he could fuck her. I’m a guy who always tries to speak positively about others, never on their back, but it brings me that crap. Why ???
So I’ll unpack my bag. To purge myself. It will do me some good, especially since he is not for nothing in my depression. He contaminated me with his conspiracy theories and social phobias. Finally, this is what I think. I will develop. I will especially try to stay lucid and to consider his arguments too. Maybe he was right, and I’m really more stupid than I think I am, after all. In any case it is impossible for me to be white as sperm snow.
Small portrait of Padawan:
Padawan is a guy who claims to be officially misanthropist. He hates people. He does not talk to anyone but always his same 3 or 4 friends geeks. Personally, he moved me away from all my other friends because he convinced me that they were not disreputable just because they drank alcohol and/or smoke. I was stupid enough to listen to him…
All those who do not eat organic and do not do 2 hours of sport per day are pussies, he said. Indeed, it is necessary to be ready to survive when we will have the revolution in France thus he train to fast for weeks and everything! His delirium is the army, but he will not join. He loves authority, discipline, intransigence. But just when he is one who commands.
His communication skills are close to zero: since high school people find him weird, nobody likes him. Except me, who always gives a chance to everyone. That is objective to say that he is rigid and full of principles. He denigrates anyone and I realize that I started to do the same, which does not make me very happy.
His deep belief is that you can not succeed if you are not Jewish. All those who succeed are Jewish or have converted. It is for this reason that he tries nothing to succeed in life. According to him, Jews govern us, use us… and if we enter the system (by working) we are working for them so it’s not worth it.
Their goal ? They can buy a spaceship and leave us when the Earth will be destroyed by pollution (it’s true that he told me that). He is hyper racist and drinks the words of Dieudonné.
Oh sorry, I forgot, there’s not only Jews that use us. There’s also pedophiles who govern us. They are either Jews or pedophiles those who have the power … and they sacrifice children in rituals and cops stifle business. His evidence: there’s evidence on Youtube! In fact, if I understood well everything, there are even sects (like Franc-massons or Illuminatis) that govern people who have the power who would be only pawns and oblige them to do what they want. Everybody lies to us!
Those in power want us to die, they hate us, they put poison in the food so that we all become sterile! Once I had invited him in a evening pancakes at my home, he had come but had eaten nothing and had explained to everybody that it was some shit. A few weeks later he had a date and invited a girl in at a pancakes-shop. Look for the error!
He is super preachy: for example, if you’re sick it’s necessarily because 2 years ago you drank alcohol (he told me that it was the cause of my depression) or because you took some Roaccutane (he took some too). There is always a New Age explanation to make you guilty to everything !
Everything can be explained by what he calls “lifestyle”. I realized later that this is a way for people who fear death to go away from it intellectually. “I cannot die because I go in for sports and eat organic food.” At the beginning it is good because you progress but after it is TOO MUCH, he has no limit, and you explode because he is never satisfied nor encouraging and absolutely not teacher (ex: to motivate you he calls you pussy it is never good enough for him). Roughly, he feels good in a domain thus takes advantage of it to criticize everybody… As soon as he sees a guy an actor or whoever topless who has a hotter body than him he claims that he necessarily takes products. And the only sport which is good it is the tae kwon do all the rest is fatal.
Besides that, he is inhabited by Hate. He calls people big bacons “, or “shit bags profiteers” and asks the RSA. He spends his days on his computer or on his guitar. He so much has nothing to do nothing that he recognizes in bars the girls who are on Adopt even if he did not speak to them. He just goes out at night to “do push-up” in the park. And if you do not go with him, you’re a “pussy gay”. He hates the fat but that doesn’t prevented him from banging one. He hates the smokers, claims that they have the pussy dry and that he can see the difference, but that does not prevent him from dipping his dick there!
Doctors cannot be trusted, do not respect them. To cure : you just eat organic and play sports. The doctors even want you to be sick to be paid. They have contracts with labs and prescribe you meds that you do not need even if they hurt you just to earn commissions.
He sees the worst in the human beings. Once he decided to drive a girl met on Adopt, he found that it was too easy to pick her up in his car, then he freaked out that that is an ambush by procurers. Just writing all that, it drives me crazy! How to live with such beliefs? I understand that I became depressed.
I think he was traumatized because he was lonely when young (a Gothic in a high school full of gold coins). And also by the fact that his mother left his father to start a new life away. Only to say that the metal is the only good music because it delivers a message not commercial and that all the rest it is necessarily some shit, it is not very normal.
Well, I probably forgot some stuff but I think he had enough.
Before finishing, one last anecdote that describes well the character: we had gone in a medicine party, he had paid the entry €10then had gone off the deep end and did not want to approach so he sat on a bench in the entrance of the club and had spent the whole evening alone on his phone there. On our way back: crisis of nerve, “never again party like that, I don’t want to kiss alcoholics, that does not interest me, etc.” The next week he wanted to go back there with me in the eparty, I confronted him, he admitted that he has some approach anxiety. OK…
The last conversation with Padawan (commented):
Padawan: I personally will stop to write some FR… it’s useless it’s to seek recognition… to what end? To become like Soral ?
Comment: 1) he did not write much FR anyway since he did not fuck since I don’t go out with him 2) like that at least he is sure that I cannot do the same thing and poke all his targets. While playing the “good guy who is above that.”
Cyprineman: you got a conscience crisis or what? it vexes you we can get you back into question? admit that you did something stupid and we forget it … it personally disappointed me a little then do not play the victim
Padawan: stop your techniques it works only on weak minds
Comment: Note that this is his great fear, being a weak mind. He criticizes everybody, society and everything. We’re all idiots. Besides that, he still lives with his father (he calls him stupid just because he drinks Coke) while he has his chemistry bac+3 degree and stopped his studies 2 years ago. He has no job, postulates nowhere and ask the RSA but calls everyone parasites.
Cyprineman: noone can tell you anything that is a problem
Padawan: the one who cries it is you huh
Cyprineman: normal well … we should let you do everything and never tell you anything
Padawan: I did not do anything and you know it very well it’s your ego that is talking
Cyprineman: yesssssssss that’s why you did it in secret while usually you send me message during 48 every time you talk to a girl I get a pad on Facebook or by SMS
Padawan: I do not owe you an account
Cyprineman: yeah well then just when you send pokes, lock chicks I have not fucked and you’ve not read like my FR about her before like that you’ll really owe me nothing … why you do not want to admit that you abused?
Padawan : but it is you who assume that I owe you something it is the comeback of the paranoid lol I told you these manipulation techniques do not work
Comment: I still have not understood why he says I was using special manipulation techniques there. And he calls me paranoid (maybe I am a bit with everytime I have been taken for a fool in my life) but I feel he is as much or more than me.
Cyprineman : I am not manipulating, I ask you a question and you’re avoiding
Padawan: wrong! you ask a question with a statement inside it’s called manipulation
Cyprineman: I see that you’re an incredible bad faith
Comment: maybe I manipulate but I did not notice it even by rereading several times. You will say that this FR is a manipulation in itself but I put the full conversation so I hope I will remain objective although of course I spend all this through the filter of my rancor (how can I do other way?)
Cyprineman: You pokes chicks I fucked knowing it well (it lasts for several years)
Padawan: so what?
Cyprineman: now it’s over the pokes of chicks when you know that I have fucked or I’ll believe you used me
Padawan: I used you absolutely not and I do what I want J
Comment: this, it means “talk to my ass my head is sick.”
Padawan: you expose yourself on the Internet by telling everything that is a bit naive
Cyprineman I know all your sex stories and I’ve never do something in your back not even just poking a girl you targeted
Padawan: nothing prevented you from that
Cyprineman: you are hypocritical
Comment: it is a little easier for him to say that no? The rules and respect are just for others and we are stupid if we fold it to live in community?
Padawan: So ok if you have a girl in your friend list she is locked
Cyprineman: nevermind
Comment: there it is a rhetorical technique where you push the argument of you interlocutor to the extreme in order to make it absurd. And I am the one who uses techniques of manipulation??
Padawan: ok but I will still poke in your friends list;)
Cyprineman: because you’re a selfish to whom we can say nothing then
Padawan: yes yes I am a big selfish that’s true that’s why I made logos & videos for you and I defended you in the street
Comment: for logos and videos remind he uses on his website as ad to sell his designer services (nobody actually buys because he has not the slightest degree). About having defended me in the street two years ago “thank you” but remember that if he was not there I would not have sat down on the floor in front of my home with him until 5am and none of this would have happened (and I would not have post-traumatic stress). And he defended himself too.
Cyprineman: You have both disappointed me (him and The metallers who is his best friend) in quick succession and I am willing to move on if you stop systematically trying to pick up the chicks I fucked
Padawan: I say nothing anymore
Cyprineman: normal there, it destabilizes you a little then you do not answer anymore Mr. Padawan is always right
Padawan: it does not work your techniques of pussy
Comment: of course, he did not say anything when short of arguments. It avoids saying something stupid, btw.
Cyprineman: I’m not happy about something that you did, what crime of lese majesty! Always say amen when it’s Padawan
Padawan: you’re not even able to understand when you’re trolled or not
Cyprineman: and yeah I’m too stupid and you’re too smart
Padawan: oh yes
Comment: After they tell you it was some humor and you have understood nothing! Easy, the exit door! After with the metallers, they believe to be superior intelligences, to be right about everything, the others are just idiots who do not think for themselves. But ultimately, are they sure to be so smart? One is unemployed, has intensified in high school and has just a little license of chemistry. The other (who claims to be misanthrope too) does a thesis of course but it lasts for 5 years I guess and he doesn’t want to work alongside. They are both intolerant and encourage mutually! With them it is everything or nothing eg before they liked everything on my blog and made my advertising and everything then from the day when I told them that I was fed up with their practices they stopped everything and began to denigrate me by using what they adored before to criticize me.
Cyprineman: so much the better, unlike you, my goal is not to annoy you
Padawan: me neither … your reaction is disproportionate! all that for a territory to prove you’re the biggest dick because we’ve been bullied when you were younger
Comment: There it is interesting because the long haired up to the ass Gothic that nobody liked in high school and that no-one was talking to … it was him.
Cyprineman: I must first find them and fuck them so you to feel the balls to game them rather effectively
Padawan: I will signal that I do the same with others huh my rabbit
Cyprineman: other you kiss but who never call you back that’s weird huh
Padawan: you know very well that it is statistically it happened three times because I’m tired of all this precisely
Cyprineman: statistics, they increase when aiming chicks I fucked
Padawan: this is normal those chicks are open they were not frightened by the womanizer you are
Cyprineman: they are open because I opened them yes, and because I put them in good conditions … the situation is unblocked
Padawan: you’re like john or Soral you have a problem with your dick
Cyprineman: it makes me feel used and taken in traitor by a guy who said he is my friend … and when I tell him to change habits that bother me, he answers no
Padawan: if I had taken you in traitor I would not even have told you I’d poked them
Cyprineman: yes, of course, you’ve vaguely told me three months after doing so… when she started to answer
Comment: the argument “you got a problem with your cock.” It’s funny, I could get out the opposite argument “you’re frustrated because you do not have sex.” In any cases, you’re fucked with this logic.
Cyprineman: it is you who hate Jews, I hate noone eh
Padawan: not related but well Soral is a degenerate cock
Cyprineman: yes the link is Soral. Well I told you what bothers me, will you stop doing it?
Padawan: Because you won’t speak to me about your conquests and you’ll keep anonyma them how you do want that it happens again?
Cyprineman: it’s a shame that I have to get there
Comment: there he is pissed off because I did not tell him who is Red pants.
Padawan: Imagine you fuck a girl and I think that’s the woman of my life … I do not have the right of poking her? and I have to live frustrated because I have to respect your territory?
Cyprineman: The banker, for example, she was the woman of your life? or you’ve tried to pick her up to empty your balls?
Padawan: well I cannot know without having fucked them 😉
Cyprineman: ok this is you want to take me for a fool again
Padawan: stop making the child
Comment: yes, there he really takes me for a fool. I am up against a wall of bad faith.
Padawan: you know I’m sometimes sentimental
Cyprineman: when it suits you yeah
Padawan: I signal you that I am like that and you have not managed to change me huh … you trained me (I did not say it was wrong)
Comment: now he pretends to be a too romantic guy who is a victim of my influence of asshole. Meanwhile: it is not me who broke the arm of a girl in a party just because she had upset me.
Padawan : but now we are having a discussion of girl
Comment: yeah, the guys fix it in the blood, it is well known.
Padawan: no woman is yours
Comment: yes, but I never said anything like that.
Cyprineman: when you send profiles chicks you’re trying to pick up on tinder, I should send a poke everytime then
Padawan: If you want
Comment: it is easy to want to push myself to be as petty as him to be able to blame me then.
Cyprineman: I’m not like that … if you do not understand that these practices are not correct then this is serious
Padawan: a girl that you fucked will not have to choose while if neither of us did … we both occupies his mind and his time
Cyprineman: well then it’s me who does the job every time and you pick up after
Comment: I basically fight all the chicks fears about one night stands, I fuck them well so that they will want to have other plans like this and he comes after me and picks. In return for ten bitches he fucked thanks to me, he had to introduce myself to two in all and for all. It’s better than nothing but by doing so he hoped I fail! To prove that he had the biggest dick precisely! I think that one of his main problem is the envy. The logic of the envy is we are not jealous of a millionaire but of a buddy who won at the bingo, yes. Because at one moment we felt “on an equal footing”. He has almost never wanted to open a book (nor even a thing about the game) but because he began seeing frequently me he began to be mad at me to be more successful than him. It’s human !
Cyprineman: I am a wholesale pigeon
Padawan: well you’re going to complain
Comment: if I got it, you can strip the money to a guy if he is rich. Robin Hood !
Padawan: ok stop you’re sick … continue EMDR I hope it will usefull
Cyprineman: I’m treating myself at least
Comment: it was not only to have the last word that I said it, I really think he has a big problem. Maybe even worse than me because he is completely in denial.
Padawan: I expected that
Cyprineman: I ask you not much
Padawan: no you’re doing it alone so handle your shit
Comment: there he is offended. I had touched a nerve.
Cyprineman: lol you reject me for girls it is serious dude
Padawan: you tell yourself that you are strong then fend for yourself
Cyprineman: it is a pity that you don’t want to do any effort on it I do not understand why you do it
Padawan: sorry I do not want to live again what I lived with L**** and with now a friend, this time I will preserve myself good luck
Comment: L**** is a girl who was raped and then twisted on antidepressants (his version). L**** is his first girlfriend who cheated on him with a black junkie who then told him she was raped (version of the metallers). In all cases, he recently fucked her again. So well…
Cyprineman: life again what? a friend ? you have a strange concept of friendship
Padawan: shut up now
Comment: I have not understood or is message is unclear?
Cyprineman: I say we forget everything but in the future we do not make the same mistakes… and you’re telling me no, I have to live it how?
Padawan: you tire me know that if you do anything to hurt me I will destroy your reputation
Cyprineman: and then you threaten me to send files?
Padawan: it is a setting not a threat you’re crazy that’s why I’m tired
Cyprineman: oh well I’m a freak?
Padawan: I exaggerate but you understand very well take care of yourself or I do not want to hear from you again
Cyprineman: have you understand that it is you who say no to everything ?
Padawan : you’re hurt and I cannot stand your moods
Cyprineman: there I suggest you not sharing chicks anymore for a healthy friendship
Padawan: I already told you that the problem was not there you think superior you can do anything while pouring in rancor and hatred.
Comment: Of course yes the problem is there. This reaction shows it well.
Padawan: I’ve already explained
Cyprineman: well explain me again and this time I’m listening
Padawan: it’s been months that I tell you even before Stephane told you … you have to stop with your dick and this desire that eats you! there’s only women who push you in life you get up you mess lives you eat to have a seduction harem you do not even fuck and when someone comes and take a woman you are not able to handle this so we’ll stop here you are locked in your bubble of seduction and all that crap (I say bullshit in the sense that it is not healthy not in the sense that it does not work)
Comment: it is totally wrong that. It is not me who get up at 1pm then spend my afternoons on the blog of Soral and Youtube to watch videos of shit then sport during 2h at 7pm then go back on the computer up to 5am. What I mean is that I have other things in my life, me. While there he will tell me he has sport and music. Sport maybe but it is his religion he goes too far with that it’s a problem and he could not do the same if he had a life outside. And the music, if you think one day live thanks to ii (or if you wait for it to happen before leaving your father) you put your finger in the eye up to the elbow.
Cyprineman: well why? I told you: we move on and we do otherwise
Padawan: we will see in some time maybe
Cyprineman: I cannot do more, if you tell me no you reject me and that it’s just excuses
Padawan: there’s no “we will another way” thing because it will always be there
Cyprineman: the problem is that I have a depression and I try to get out without the meds … you sermon “without pills” but you like the metallers who takes whole tubes of anxiolytic … it is less boring
Padawan: No I never wanted him to take medication
Cyprineman: yeah well he took and that’s why he is bearable if not he would be in the same condition even worse than me
Padawan: not necessarily
Comment: the metallers he’s a guy who claps crises alone where he bangs head against the wall, where he insults people on FB, etc. In 2013 he told me that his (single) ex had complained against him for harassment. He said she was a bitch who exaggerated. Now as soon as a girl is interested in him a little bit, it ends she complains of being harassed. And he always denies! I think he does not even realize ! Before, I believed him, until he starts acting like that with me. That day, I understood … so yeah, I think it does him good to take antidepressants. Moreover, the metallers one day started to flirt with a girl that me and Padawan had gang-banged. Miraculously he managed to fuck her (once will not hurt – I still do not understand how or why) and there Padawan felt as bad as me but he made the fake-ass and did nothing and said him nothing. It is me who had a heaache with him. Padawan did not support me, just in the shadows. Maybe he was playing a double game, on reflection, that’s really courageous!
Cyprineman: so you’ve got principles but apparently your comfort always comes first
Padawan: every case is unique
Cyprineman: you reject me because of my depression
Padawan: you want me to all with you
Comment: people, it is often that. Full of principles! But when they have to realize they rarely follow their principles. That’s why the French have followed the Nazis while been able to look in the mirror again after.
Cyprineman: I hope you’ll step back and understand how unfair you’re and you’ll not be too proud to come back to me
Padawan: nothing to do with that I’ll just wait that you’ll feel better
Comment: So, basically, we’re friends but just when I’m not sick. What a little motherfucker! After that I removed him from my Facebook. And I do not regret. I do not want to hurt him but I do not miss him. I prefer to leave him in his world and coming back in real life.
Thereafter, for him?
Now that I will not be there to bring him chicks, what he will do? Going on an online app (ease), take the first coming and to couple with her.
Then call her “pussy” force her to play sports, play the romantic while he is dying to fuck others, to eat organic, only fruits and vegetables, talk to her about his theories about plot, denigrating everything and everyone (especially me I guess), fuck her without condoms because he cannot have AIDS because he makes sport and eat organic (yes he told me that). You understand, his immune system is at his top!
She’ll piss him off, he will call her idiot but won’t tell her. He will stay with her a few months while it no longer works “because a girl with me should be treated like a princess.” Then they’ll break up because she will understand that this guy does more bad than good although at first it can give good advice on the lifestyle, he is way too extreme.
Well, pff. Especially the guy still said a few months that he would not go in a serious relationship with a girl he barely knows, especially if she is not blonde, tall and Nordic. Lately he had a date with a girl but fantasized about her sister, true story.
Completely incoherent, this guy. He said that life was better anywhere else but here. But he never did anything to move. He prefers to remain inactive and lament. And above all, criticizing those who do things.
The positive: I fucked a girl in my car.
I found on Tinder a girl who I was just talking to in high school. We said hello, I made her jokes (I was a clown before) but that’s it. She was cute.
I had not said to her that I recognized her at first (we lost touch after high school) but I told her after sex. Like what, it is never too late to fuck a girl but it’s not a reason to procrastinate.
Online game very classic : I did her the routine questions, one of the most powerful techniques I know and that I give for not much money considering its power in my ebook about seduction online.
When asked about her fantasies, she replied “I want to make love in a car.” I have proposed to carry it out, she played the holy hypocrite but I played the game : the one who reassured her and everything.
We finally went for a drive and I fucked her on my back seat. Not without tachycardia.
Otherwise, the English I mentioned last time, it’s case closed too. But I’m too excited to further develop.
See you later.
I leave you with Padawan’s last FR full of bad faith (3 November 2014):
Yesterday I was on a mission with a pole dancer. I must say that I did not really like her face in the different pictures she had put online but her little body looked firm so I went there!
Place Richelme at 21:15. I finally went on the fountain of the Town Hall Square in the meantime because I was ahead. I must admit I was stressed to death! “And what if she is ugly! I’ll have to bear the whole evening” I said to myself… well my stress has vanished when she arrived. A small blue-eyed brunette pretty class, very very fine and full of good energy! We begin to look for a bar while chatting: it was a misery because it was a Sunday and also because there was a match of the OM (Mongolian Olympic). I let you imagine the atmosphere in the bars … We ended up at the mansion. There were not many people. It’s been a while since I had not gone there.
She takes a mojito and me a virgin mojito … “ying and yang” I said. She then tells me she has just been hypnotized by a guy in a show. So I took the opportunity to say some bullshit. I was a little less relaxed when a band came just next to us to watch the game! Her, she does not care and tells me that she has a difficult past, she saw a guy dying at Les Prêcheurs in her arms … because of a ball. Outch! I also told the aggression of last year … We talk a lot about sport and that, it makes me happy J
The manor then locks so we go onto a bench at Les Cardeurs, she is cold, so I let my hands wander on her back, her thighs. Then we each meet a friend, what reduces the voltage but I manage to raise the temperature quickly. His friend also confused me with her ex! “Yes he had a square face and blue eyes like you! He was handsome” and I answer “I know I am handsome” with the appropriate subtext what makes her blush. Despite my heat, she wants to go in her car. She wanted to go but did not want it to end up there 🙂 She wants to drop me right next to my car, so we leave direction Les Prêcheurs (the place she wants to avoid).
Once there we talk again about hypnosis: she shows me videos it’s pretty crazy, I would like to understand how it works, even to game with! People fall asleep and cannot do anything … She said she is very tired (because of hypnosis and probably alcohol), I took her several times in my arms and she comes next to me to fall asleep then wakes up. At that time, she drools a little … I had already submitted her by the look so I did it again, go deep in my seat. At a moment she started talking I had an impulse, I grabbed her neck and I kissed her. She likes it and so do I, a little shy but very sweet tongue. I shortened it all and quickly went out of her car, as if I was running away. “With a kiss I feel better, let’s go to sleep,” she nods when I get into my car she looks at me still quite upset and happy.
In short, a nice evening! On the other hand, I wonder if she will send me a message … seen what happened with the last two ones, I do not know what block my game right now. It’s strange but I do not feel it, one more time! I forgot to say that throughout the evening, a guy she had seen on Friday (met on Tinder) kept harassing her … unbelievable … I’m glad to have realized the use of the subtext too. I thought about that all evening and I have to say it helped me a lot with the intonation of my voice it’s a formidable weapon! I’ll use it all the time J
Next night out, Tuesday or Wednesday, it depends on my favorite wingman!
The comments :
My answer: if you do not feel it, it’s a good sign because last time you felt it haha!
the subtext it’s a weapon of Cajun, you’ll discover in my translation coming out soon
His answer: Well after I got anxious because I’m afraid that it is repeating. An idea of why and how the blocking point?
My answer: You lecture them too much (and you brag and you clear off as a thief)
His answer: But yesterday I calmed down: p and I did it before … it had not prevented me from going further several times!
My answer: you’ve maybe missed some pretty butts anyway
His answer: Maybe … and you influence me, me too I want 100% :p (1date = 1FC) maybe this is why I am not satisfied. One year and a half ago, it was so awesome for me to kiss a girl this way … Well she did not send the message, I did send one but I knew she was not going to answer. After all, I don’t give a fuck, she’s cute but not much : p
May the God of Game gives us all a penis AND a vagina. It will be easier!